There is nothing quite like reading an inspiring book during the holiday season. Taking time out for reading is a cathartic experience that can make time fly by effortlessly. Panayotis Pascot’s “La prochaine fois que tu mordras la poussière” has been my companion throughout various spaces this winter – from the bustling metro stations in Paris to the serene TGV to Lyon, and even the cozy coffee shops in Corsica.
The release of Pascot’s book came quite as a surprise, especially considering my familiarity with him from his time as a reporter at Le Petit Journal with Yann Barthès and as a comedian, notably his stand-up show “Presque”, available on Netflix. His book is one of the best-selling books in France, coming ahead of authors such as Amélie Nothomb, Sorj Chalandon or Maria Pourchet, and echoes the voices of esteemed authors such as Abdellah Taïa and Édouard Louis.
Within this novel, Pascot courageously exposes his innermost self, tackling the complexities of his relationship with family, friends, and lovers – notably his poignant exploration of his relationship with his ailing father. He grapples with and, to some degree, comes to terms with his sexuality and mental well-being.
This intimate and refreshing addition to the current French literary landscape delves into the effects of patriarchy and toxic masculinity on Pascot, whom he describes as being ensnared in a “piège” (trap). In his quest for acceptance, Pascot navigates the painful terrain of performative masculinity, comparing himself to a “mannequin” stripped of its identity or to an actor playing a role. During one of his relations with a girlfriend he admits: “Je veux me rappeler ce que c’est qu’être un homme. Et souvent je me trompe...[…]Plus un homme, un homme dépossédé de toute virilité”. Hopping from one romantic relationship to another, each one is peppered with shame and self-deceit. Pascot unveils a two-way dance of both rejection and reaffirmation of his homosexuality.
Pascot notably weaves in his narrative existential thoughts, intimate ideas, and childhood memories that one often ponders yet hesitates to voice in the presence of others. At times, he also feels caught within the “artificial” web of society that he denounces as mundane and repetitive – the routine of work, family obligations, and festive celebrations like Christmas. Writing and artistic creation seem, among other things, to serve as his lifeboat, providing solace amidst the turbulence of life.
As I came to the last pages of this novel, it became clear to me that it captures the challenges and struggles inherent in communicating with those closest to us, intertwined with an underlying desire to both give and receive love. Much like the sentiments conveyed in Taïa’s work, Pascot demonstrates through his unique voice that he, too, is digne d’être aimé.
Alan Gómez
Youth Programs Manager
Alan Gómez presently serves as Youth Programs Manager in the Department of Education. Alan holds an A.M. in French Studies from Brown University and an M.A. in Francophone Studies from CSU, Long Beach. Alan has also lived and studied in Paris, Corsica, and Perugia. He is trained in 2nd and 3rd+ language acquisition, FLE, foreign language pedagogy and literary studies.
Prior to joining the French Library, Alan was a lecturer of French and Spanish at Bryant University where he taught language and culture, critical thinking, and writing and composition. Co-author of the innovative textbook, Juntos: French for Speakers of English and Spanish (2015), his recent scholarly contributions include the chapter Intercomprehension of the Romance Languages in the L3+ Classroom [...] (2020).
